Tightening Up the Graphics on Level Three

If you read this website you might think I only play EQII but I do enjoy playing non-MMO games as well. I occasionally even watch G4 Tech TV (or whatever it's called these days, I can't keep up). X-Play is really the only show I can stand. But lately, I can't even watch that because for the past month the most absolutely annoying commercial in history is being shown during literally every commercial break. Trust me, if you have ever watched G4TV more than ten minutes you've seen it already.

It's a commercial for Westwood Online, some kind of technical school. I've been meaning to write about this for a while but I just got around to uploading the video for your viewing "pleasure." It is available here.

The commercial opens with two "cool" dudes in some bizarre 80's gear playing a video game. Of course, you get the Space Invaders sound effects every movie and TV show uses for video games. One of the dudes is furiously moving the analog stick on what looks like a PS1 controller while the other is just kind of shaking his.

The set-up is that you think they are two people with "regular jobs" goofing off. "Dude, the boss is coming?" Oh no! What will we do?!? "Dude, I almost got it!"

But wait, it turns out that these guys are really in the gaming business! Wow!

"Finish testing that game yet? I've got another one I need designed."

Ah, they just finished up level three and need to tighten up the graphics a little bit. Wait, are they testers? Game designers? Graphics artists? Are they really tightening up the graphics by shaking some controllers around?

Now, whenever someone asks me at work how a project is going I simply respond, "I just finished up level three and need to tighten up the graphics a little bit." It works well.

Boy, they have to design another whole game already, cut these guys a break. Maybe they're working on the sequel to Mourning.

When one of the dudes says, "I can't believe we got jobs doing this!" I'm not sure if he is referring to the game design job or the fact that someone hired these two as actual actors.

The absolute worst is when one screeches, "And my mother said I would never get anywhere with these games!" You really have to hear the murderous rage he delivers this line with as if he was going to beat his mother to death with an Xbox controller. I don't know what issues he has with his mother but I would guess they require years of intensive therapy.

The punchline to the whole thing is that when they show the number for the school there is a line underneath which reads, "Not intended for residents of Texas or Massachusetts." I couldn't make this stuff up. You know you're going to a prestigious school when it's banned in certain states.

The scary thing is, aside from being annoying these guys may be ripping off unsophisticated people. I have a friend who once said, "I like Halo 2 a lot. Can I get a job with that?" Sigh. I don't think it works that way but this commercial really targets that mentality. Work in the gaming industry and play games all day for lots of money! Yeah, right.

Of course, if I'm totally off-base and any successful Westwood Online alumni would like to write in and set me straight I'd be happy to post your comments.